31 months NED, 31 months and counting... That feels so wonderful to say and yesterday also gave me another step, another milestone to aim for. If I am still NED at my next check up in 4 months time, June, then I will not be seen until December! I will have moved to 6 monthly checks, I can't believe it, 6 monthly. I sit here thinking about that, 6 monthly checks, when I think back to the dark days, the early days I couldn't even think 6 months into the future and now it's 6 months between hospital visits and I couldn't be happier.
I know I haven't beaten this yet but I'm winning, I'm in the lead. I have said all along that I'm a survivor at 10 years, I'm a survivor at discharge. That's not looking at the down side, about being glass half empty, it's about being truthful to myself. I have said that was my only goal from the start but as each appointment gets further and further apart I get closer to it, I feel better because in my head the further apart the checks the less likely the recurrence. I know people say "oh but if you were to have something come back then they would catch it early" well guess what I don't want them to catch something early I want them to be confident there is less chances of it coming back, that means longer appointment times. So I'm going to take 31 months, aim for 35 months and then 6 monthly, that's it for now, no more no less, time to breathe, time to relax. My body and brain crashed last night, it always does afterwards and I end up ill, I think the stress leaves and my body just sort of regroups and gets ready to go again. I'm still feeling rough today but it's a good rough, I'm smiling and the pressure has been released. It will build again, of course it will but for now it's gone and that feels great.
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Darren EvansOn Feb 11th 2013 my life changed forever when I was diagnosed with a myxoid liposarcoma of the right thigh. This is my version of my life since then. Archives
June 2018
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