Well here I sit, my normal spot at the WRVS cafe at City Hospital Nottingham. I've had my chest xray amd now its my routine that is kicking in. My radiologist was the lady who first did me back on 11th Feb 2013, she has done me lots of times since but everytime that doubt nags, the pattern, the previous experience..... I'm not one for food photos either but again another part of the routine..No coffee it makes me even more hyper than I already am and that isn't a good thing!! Nice cup of weak tea and loads of sugar, I know I'm on a diet but today is a lots of sugar day...
It's because I haven't eaten yet, I can't face it, I feel sick to my stomach, I can taste it in my throat and it is making me worse. I'm not overly scared, I'm fidgety, I want it done and over now but I'm not scared so to speak. I am worried of course, I don't want to be told there is a recurrence but I know now after speaking to so many wonderful people that a recurrence doesn't always mean terminal, it means a pain in the arse and a lot more treatment but it doesn't always mean terminal and thats what I need to think. So OK its 1415 hrs (sorry still use Army time..) and its time for my walk down the corridor. In there 5 minutes before, no more than that because there is always a delay... And then its hello to the staff, take a seat and fidget and fuss until the door opens and "Darren, Darren Evans" is called. OK that's it no more putting it off, wish me luck! Time to start walking....
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Darren EvansOn Feb 11th 2013 my life changed forever when I was diagnosed with a myxoid liposarcoma of the right thigh. This is my version of my life since then. Archives
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